Another regular I will call “Madge”. Madge is an older lady (maybe mid-60’s) who keeps me in cigarettes. She doesn’t smoke nor does she have any idea that she’s my enabler. What Madge does is tip me a quarter for every single drink she has. It may not sound like much, but she drinks 15-20 beers every night; I smoke a pack a day—you do the math. It didn’t take me long to do it and realize that she’s got my smokes covered. There’s a rich dude and his wife who get half my rent but that’s a different story altogether.

Madge is a cool old lady who moved here in the 60’s and has a lot of great stories about how Venice has changed for good and bad. She’s laid back and can stand “Cliff” about as much as I can. One time, after one of his ultimate bullshit stories (that trumped one of her doozies) she simply poured a beer in his lap, got up and left. I bought her a couple of free ones after that and we became buds.

I swear she’s read every book ever written and has a solid opinion on everything—one she can actually back up three questions into an argument. She’s a breath of fresh air in a business where most people just repeat what they heard some dipshit like O’Reilly say and think they have their own opinion. You know the types, the ones who sound off like they know it all and then you question them and they can’t back it up with anything but anger and non-logical arguments. Well Madge definitely ain’t one of them and I like her.

Why shouldn’t I after all, she buys my smokes.